If you thought cliché Instagram posts were just for the pumpkin spice drowned Autumn months, think again. The cold weather is driving more people indoors, giving them ample opportunity to stage Insta pics that they saw on Pinterest or Tumblr or wherever else annoying photo trends come from.
Here are your 7 cliché Intas to take this winter:
The First Snow
If you’re #blessed enough to get a white winter/Christmas, the whole world needs to know about it. Even though everyone else in your city/town is also experiencing the same thing, update the world about your current change of scenery.
Your Christmas Tree
A fake Christmas Tree? As If! These days, your level of class is directly correlated to the realness of your tree. You’re kind of lazy and a basic if your family rocks the fake tree. We get it. It’s easy to set up and you don’t have to worry about the maintenance of a real tree. But, lesbihonest, betches kind of pride themselves on not being low-maintenance. Buying a real tree from a tree lot kind of ups your game and gives you a pretty OK insta opportunity. Real bad ass betches travel some distance, pretend to enjoy nature, and have someone else cut down a real tree out of nature. Thanks, nature! Obvi, this last situation creates the best photo op and will probably make people the most jealous.
Socks, Cocoa, Fireplace
No one can fucking stand this photo, and yet, people keep posting it. No one really wants to see a low-angled photo of your cocoa or coffee in your lap, feet covered by fuzzy socks, and, beyond that, a crackling fireplace. The caption should probably say something about “spending a cozy night indoors” or “staying warm”. Gag me. All this insta says to people is that you were too lazy/cold to leave your house to party so you’re justifying your boring night with a picture. Good for you.
If you don’t take a picture when you go skiing, did you really even go? Enough said.
A photo of you snorkeling or rocking your confusingly toned winter bikini body let’s people know two things: 1. That you have enough money to travel somewhere not fucking freezing and 2. They should be jealous of you.
Elf on the Shelf
What is that naughty little friend up to?! No one fucking cares. Stop posting these pictures thinking people will be impressed by the creativity with which you scare the shit out of children.
Are you studying for finals in a coffee shop or just avoiding the cold by grabbing a cup of Joe? (OK, no one actually calls it “a cup of joe”) Well then, congratu-fucking-lations, you’ve opened yourself up to the opportunity of posting a latte art photo. TBH latte art is kind of annoying because I don’t want the guilt of destroying a masterpiece while just trying to drink my fucking six dollar latte. I guess that’s why we need this Insta: to commemorate the foam swan or lotus or heart in your drank. Bonus points if there’s a book in the photo with the latte. It says, like, I’m boring but I’m also really cliché.