Whether you’re spending this horrible holiday holding out for diamonds from your signif other OR ready to sit alone, eat nachos, wear those ugly ass sweatpants, and watch a slasher movie, you’ll need alcohol.
Of course, you could go the classy route and chug a bottle of white on your own, but let’s broaden our horizons here. I mean, it’s Valentine’s Day – the best made-up holiday of the whole year! Let’s take this shit to a new level.
We’ve rounded up four amazing draaank recipes that’ll make you feel classy and trashy, all at the same time. Like a perfect marriage, you and these drinks were made for each other.
Do you dream of being really fucking fancy? This cocktail blends Armagnac, Champagne, and Grand Marnier for a super amazing drank.
- 1 oz. Bas-Armagnac Chateau du Tariquet VS
- 1 oz. orange liqueur – I used Grand Marnier because duh
- Brut Champagne – you def already have this on hand
- 1-2 Maraschino cherries – don’t act like these aren’t in your fridge for those late night sundaes
- Pour the Armagnac into a Champagne glass. Add the Grand Marnier, then fill with Champagne and stir gently with a spoon. Garnish with a Maraschino cherry.
A refreshing sipper that’ll definitely show off what a fucking overacheiever you are when it comes to culinary shit.
- 1 oz. Diplomático Reserva Exclusiva rum
- 1/4 oz. Diplomático Reserva rum
- 2 oz. ruby port
- 3/4 oz. lemon juice
- 1/4 oz. simple syrup
- 1/4 oz. Grenadine (if you don’t have exactly this, just use the liquid from the Maraschino cherry container
- Orange zest
Fill a cocktail shaker with ice. Add all of the ingredients and shake like Taylor Swift told you to. Strain and serve in a chilled cocktail glass. Garnish with the orange twist.
If you love ice cream and Kahlua, you’ll love this shit. Think of Amarula like a cross between Kahlua and Bailey’s, but, like, smoother.
- 2 ½ oz. Amarula
- ½ cup vanilla ice cream
- 2-3 teaspoons strawberry puree – you can make your own, obviously
- Fresh strawberry
Blend ingredients and pour into a martini glass. Garnish with a fresh strawberry so that you feel good about eating fruit for the day.