Just when you thought it was warm enough that everyone would put away their ugly hats for the summer, someone has invented a beanie that has a bluetooth system built in. The new hat will allow people who have no self respect to walk around listening to music and making phone calls without ever taking their Samsung Galaxy or whatever bullshit out of their pocket. Truth be told, I don’t always hate beanies. I have a bigger problem with bluetooth speakers being added to anything that’s primarily an item of clothing. This is almost as bad as those hoodies where the drawstrings are actually earbuds.
Just to keep the hipsters happy, the next new product will probably be a bluetooth koozie that’s only made to go with PBR. Either that or like a pair of Toms that have solar panels attached to them. Whatever the next hipster invention is, it’s sure to be disgusting.