Selena Gomez Doesn’t Understand The Internet

Former member of Canadian royalty Selena Gomez has herself a photo spread in InStyle UK, where she demonstrates her disdain for both bras and shoes (same). There’s also an accompanying interview (if you’re into that sort of thing), where she dishes on everything from love to being besties with TSwift. Did you know that she doesn’t like talking about her relationship with Justin Bieber because she never wanted her life to become a tabloid story, despite actively dating an anthropomorphic tabloid story? It’s true. She also dropped this nugget (emphasis mine):

Right now, Gomez is dating – reluctantly. “I hate it,” she smites with a wince. “It’s hard and I’m weirded out by the idea that a guy has googled me before we meet, and that has happened.” She also adds: “I feel like I look 16 sometimes, which is a bummer because I would love to date older guys.”


Selena. Girl. Mi querida. What is it about your life, from being on TV since you were a tween to dating the most famous pop star on Earth to having a respectable music career of your own, leads you to believe that anyone you date doesn’t know exactly who the fuck you are? I mean, I get it. It would be weird to sit down to dinner with someone knowing that they know so much about you, while you don’t know them from Adam. I understand, but that’s precisely the price of celebrity. You either date someone else equally head-up-their-own-ass famous, or you date some anonymous schmo who the paparazzi will constantly ask to move out of frame.

Also: Can Selena’s acknowledgment of her youthful looks put an end to the whole “you’re a pervert if you think Selena Gomez/Sarah Hyland/Emma Watson is hot” bullshit? Those women are 23, 24 and 25, respectively. Yeah, they look kinda young, and yeah, I’d butter their muffins. So? Not only is that rhetoric kind of demeaning to them (“sorry sweetie, you can’t be sexualized because you don’t meet my definition of sexual”), but you may as well put a stamp on your forehead that says “pretty people make me jealous.”

In the meantime, Selena: I’m here, I’m older than you and I haven’t googled you in, like, a week.


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