Ryan Reynolds Wants You To Stop Tweeting Him Your Depraved Sexual Fantasies

I’m not going to lie to you, I’m pretty over Twitter. I think it’s stupid that everyone’s allowed to voice all the dumb things they think about on any given day and at any given time. Like, no Audrey, I don’t give a fuck that the line at Ulta is super long or that you just spent $200 on a contour kit. However, one person who’s not only interesting (hot, talented, and married to Serena van der Woodsen) but also exceedingly hilarious in his own right, has begun to restore my faith in this poor excuse for social media. That’s right everyone; I’m talking about Deadpool himself, Ryan Reynolds.

Recently Ryan Reynolds’ fans have come out of the woodwork to ask him via Twitter for explicitly sexual favors that might even make Christian Grey cringe. But Van Wilder handles every absolutely disgusting request like a fucking pro, tweeting back at someone who had requested for Ryan to “tear [their] appendix out [and] tickle [their] asshole” that he’s “just trying to finish this charcoal sketch of The Last Supper.” Obviously he’s super busy and can’t get to your heinous fantasy right now, but at least you get to feel like you’re famous for 5 minutes while his tweet is retweeted and favorited 40 trillion times. #Blessed

Anyway, that’s not even the best tweet. Ryan’s been clapping back at Twitter trolls for months now and in honor of his sense of humor, I give you, Ryan Reynold’s best comebacks:

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