Ryan Lochte Lied To His Mom (And The World) About Being Robbed At Gunpoint

Olympic swimmer Ryan Lochte made an international splash last week when he told NBC’s Billy Bush he’d been held up at gunpoint after a night of partying in Brazil. And we were all like, “Oh yeah, lol, totally makes sense! Rio is crazy! TG you’re alive, Ryan!”

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But then, because all good things have to come to an end, Ryan’s story fell apart, the Brazilian police tried to confiscate his passport, and now it seems like he’s just completely full of shit. What the fuck happened?

At its core, this is a story about how lying to your mom can truly fuck you.

Ryan Lochte

Ryan and his swimmer pals were out Saturday night celebrating at the French Olympic House in Rio. According to Ryan, they were held up at gunpoint after hailing a taxi to go home. Ryan claimed that masked gunmen approached the taxi, told all of the swimmers to get out, and one of the gunmen then cocked his gun and put it to Ryan’s forehead.

Which apparently, like, never happened. But it’s at least what Ryan told his mom, and then she told NBC, and the rest is history.

Police are insisting that Ryan and his buddies actually vandalized a gas station bathroom on the way home. Two armed security guards approached them, brandished a gun, and Lochte and the swimmers gave them money to essentially pay them off for the damages to the bathroom. Apparently a gun was indeed pulled on Lochte, but it was only to “control him.”

What happens in Rio, right?

Ryan Lochte Kiss

Anyways, Ryan hasn’t spoken to the media since the rest of this shitstorm came out. He also made it safely back to the United States before the judge could properly seize his passport.

Will he be charged with a crime in Brazil? Probs not. Does he look like a fucking idiot? Yup.


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