In many aspects of your life, you’re an adult but don’t feel like one. There are times you wonder if you missed the day when they were handing out manuals to being a grown up, considering you can barely even do your own laundry. However, when it comes to relationships, you realize you’ve grown with each one. I mean, just think back to how you approached dating before you had sex. Things were a lot different back then. Maybe even simpler? Here are a few key differences.
As a virgin: You use descriptors like “cute” and “nice smile” and “sweet”.
Now: You use descriptors like “stable” and “emotionally available.”
As a virgin: You skip from holding hands and making out to imagining your married life with kids in a house similar to the one you grew up in.
Now: You imagine spending the next closest holiday with him. Maybe it’s Valentine’s Day, but maybe it’s St. Patrick’s Day. One step at at ime.
As a virgin: Is it true love? Is it going to be forever?
Now: Should I go on birth control? Or delete my Tinder?
As a virgin: All the time. He’s the center of your universe.
Now: Like 20% of the time. The other 80% you’re thinking about your job, your friends, your exes, whatever.
As a virgin: He has no flaws. He’s the one, probably.
Now: They’re a good indicator of whether things will work out in the long run between you two and you pay attention to them.
As a virgin: You take it personally. If he cheats or lies to you, it’s a personal attack.
Now: It’s his problem. If he cheats or lies, you know it’s saying more about him than it is about you.
As a virgin: You are terrified to say how you really feel.
Now: If you feel something, say something.
As a virgin: Maybe I should have sex with him, that will make things better.
Now: Is he worth it? Maybe it’s time to move on.
As a virgin: You spend time agonizing over every detail and what went wrong. You wonder if there’s any way you can make things go back to how they were.
Now: Finally. That was a long time coming. On to the next.