Everyone knows Pope Francis isn’t like a regular Pope, he’s a cool Pope. Well, he might need to tell his film critic to get with the program, because his review of the new Star Wars movie wasn’t exactly glowing. The reviewer said called the movie clumsy, sloppy, and tacky, which is sure to make a few dedicated fans leave the Catholic Church. He went on to say that the only good thing about the movie is that it shows, “by contrast, how the direction of the previous films was elegant, balanced and above all appropriate.” We don’t know that much about Star Wars, but it’s pretty bad when the Vatican is telling you that you made a shittier movie than Episode I. The critic also said that the new villains aren’t good depictions of evil, probably because their names aren’t Judas and Satan.
To be fair, this review is coming from the Vatican film critic, not the Pope himself. Francis “doesn’t watch movies,” according to an official Vatican source. Tbh the whole place sounds like a ton of fun, but we’d rather watch all seven Star Wars movies than be locked in the Vatican City and never allowed to have sex.