Great News: The Nation’s First Penis Transplant Just Happened

This is not a drill. Massachusetts General Hospital has successfully performed the first dick transplant, otherwise known as a “genitourinary reconstructive (penile) transplant.” Right.

The 15-hour surgery #blessed patient Thomas Manning with a new piece of junk that now has “blood flow established.” TMI, Massachusetts Gen.

After Manning tragically lost his manhood in 2012 to penile cancer (they literally amputated his penis), he’s been without a little friend ever since. He still can’t really use the new penis, but surgeons are “cautiously optimistic” that complete function will be established.

Honestly, good for you Tommy. The loss of a penis is a devastating life event. Penises are 95% of the reason betches talk to your gender. But Manning was a real champ, even agreeing to having his picture plastered on Facebook with a flaccid thumbs-up.

This surgery is just a small step for mankind, big leap for penis lovers everywhere.

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