Matt Bellassai is a senior editor at Buzzfeed who pretty much gets paid to be drunk at work and then tweet about it. If you aren’t following him on twitter then you should do so ASAP because his tweets are everything we wish we could say and not get fired for.
When Matt isn’t in a bar starting fights with DJ’s who won’t play Beyonce or at the Buzzfeed offices starting internet campaigns to meet Harry Styles, he’s locked up in his apartment hungover as fuck and getting food delivered to his door while he tweets about how much he hates everyone. Matt Bellassai is the gay New Yorker we all wish we could be.
He spends Sundays the way they should be spent: getting blacked at brunch and then using the rest of the day to nap it off. His coworkers obvi know he’s the HBIC and have created an entire vine account to showcase it. There’s even a tumblr dedicated to reasons Matt is complaining, and they all seem pretty fucking valid to me. You know you’ve made it when the company that you work for creates a post dedicated to how great your tweets are.
He got drunk at work to live tweet the One Direction concert movie. I don’t care if you like One Direction or not, he got drunk at work to live tweet a movie and no one stopped him. At this point I’m pretty sure Buzzfeed just exists to facilitate his twitter relationship with Harry Styles.
So to recap, Matt Bellasai:
- Is always drunk
- Doesn’t do work
- Aggressively loves Beyonce
- Fucking runs Buzzfeed
- Naps like it’s his job (which it kind of is)
- Is always complaining
- Generally hates people
If that doesn’t sound like a betch to you then you are wrong but will probably leave unnecessary comments anyways, so you can go shave your back now. He woke up like this and doesn’t give a fuck what you think about it, and for that Matt will always be a betch in our hearts.