How To Manage Your Valentine’s Day Expectations

Valentine’s Day is the actual worst. It’s not just bad for single people who get their singleness rubbed into their face for a day/weekend. It’s also kind of miserable for people in relationships or the quasi-what-are-we-even?-relationships.

Even the most chill betches have been known to get their hopes up for Valentine’s Day only to be sorely disappointed by their significant other when the 14th rolls around. Here’s what to do to not make yourself pathetic and sad this year. Ew.

Instagram isn’t real

Someone probably really boring and wise once said “Comparison is the thief of joy”. Most of the time, comparison should bring you joy because your fucking awesome life looks pretty, well, fucking awesome compared to the lives of all the other basics out there. On Valentine’s Day though, just don’t hang out on social media unless you have the greatest day of all time and need to show off. That probably won’t happen, though. Your boyfriend is probably not going to bring you six-dozen roses or a Cartier Love bracelet. What he gives you is probably special in its own way, and you can never fault a guy for trying, but his acts of affection won’t stack up to that Tumblr and Instagram nonsense.

Don’t think you’re getting engaged

If you’ve been in a seriously relationship for a while, don’t think Valentine’s Day is THE DAY you’re getting engaged. I can think of nothing more pathetic than a V Day engagement, well, maybe other than a Christmas Day engagement. Gross. You should be praying your boyfriend is more original and less of a hack than that.

Keep it low-key

Don’t overwhelm yourself trying to make your entire day look like a sentimental love-fest that could make Nicholas Sparks jealous. Also, don’t be a fucking idiot and spend a bunch of money on shit you can’t afford in order to make yourself look or feel loved. If you aren’t feeling the love without the stupid holiday madness, maybe it’s time to reevaluate your relationship. Best advice: Care very little about what happens on Valentine’s Day and you won’t be disappointed if it doesn’t stack up to your wildest dreams. Also, remember to care about what actually does happen. If a dude goes out of his way to make you feel special, that’s pretty impressive by itself. Say thank you.

Do what you love

My motto for Valentine’s Day is similar to that of birthdays, if you’re doing what you love, you probz won’t be disappointed. If you don’t like going to a prix fixe meal and eating by candlelight, don’t fucking think you need to do that because Jessica in accounting thinks that’s the only way to go. If you think hiking and drinking beer with your lover is the best, do that. If you think brunch and a solid hookup sesh is great, do that.  Don’t do something you hate because it will look cool on Instagram. Just do you. That’s the betch way/best way.  


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