Happy Bachelor Monday, fam. We’re back to talking about the one TV franchise that literally takes up more time than football season and March Madness combined. (Don’t fight me on that. You don’t stalk the players’ Instagrams in between games.) If you follow Krystal on social media, you’ve probably noticed she’s even more *Krystal* online than she was on the show. Like, IDK what bothers me more—the fact that she straight-up said the phrase “needle dick” or that she goes by @coachkrystal_ on social media. I’m so concerned. Anyway, whether you refer to Krystal as the most annoying voice in Bachelor history or the girl on a mission to find
brand endorsements true love, you can’t deny her body looks amazing. So, I decided to try her “beach workout” myself. I found it on her Instagram, obviously.
Unfortunately, my “beach workout” was done in the gym because I live in New York, but I feel like I still got the gist of it. Here’s how it went:
¼ Mile Run
Coach Krystal (cringing as I type that) claims this workout is her “FAVORITE way” to beat stress, but honestly running sucks, and in my opinion it’s pretty stressful. Like, I feel personally victimized by the incline setting on the treadmill. Plus, I could think of a couple other ways to chill out
like smoke weed, but running works I guess. I was totally dreading the run portion of the workout, but then I got on the treadmill and like, reached ¼ mile before I even made it through one song. I was confused. Is this a typo? Why would anyone only run ¼ mile? Could I actually get fit running for less time than it takes me to brush my teeth? Okay, moving on.
10 Step Ups (Each Leg)
I used a bench at the gym for this one, and I even held dumbbells in my hands to make it a bit harder. Like, stepping up on a bench 10 times is pretty basic, so I figured the added weight could make it more interesting. Am I already more qualified to be a “coach” than Krystal? Honestly, these aren’t terrible, so I’m going to tentatively say yes. I definitely felt the burn in my glutes and quads, and I’d definitely recommend adding the weights. But obviously no shade to Krystal’s version…
10 Tricep Dips
These ones are tough. Tricep dips are extra tricky because you’re not actually using any added weight, but you’re also low-key using your entire body weight at the same time. You’re basically holding onto a bench behind you while facing the other direction, and then straightening and bending your arms to bring your body up and down with your triceps. Krystal does these with her legs straight, but you can also keep them bent to make it a bit easier. It’s more important that you’re getting full range of motion with the dipping part of the movement.
10 Leg Raises
Leg raises are always a good lower ab exercise. I’m a fan. Doing only 10 sounds easy, but it’s important to do these slowly to really engage your core and feel the burn in the lower part of your abs. The idea is to lie flat with your legs out in front of you, and then raise them up and down while keeping your back flat and your core tight. Krystal does these with her hands behind her head, but if you feel any lower back pain, I suggest keeping your hands under your lower back area.
10 Toe Touches
Another good one—more focused on the upper abs. Staying in the same position as your leg raises, keep your legs in the air, as straight as possible, and then try to touch your feet or toes, bringing your shoulders off the ground with your core. Also, a lot of people do weird shit with their neck here, but try to keep it as neutral as possible and really just use your abs to lift. These should be done faster than the leg raises, so 10 of them should go by pretty fast. Thanks, Krystal.
20 Bicycle Crunches
This is a good burnout move, and it’s also for your abs. No wonder this girl has a six-pack. Put your hands behind your head, then bring your knees in towards your chest and lift your shoulder blades off the ground, touching your elbow to the opposite knee in every rep. Bicycle crunches are usually done too fast, but it’s really not a race. It’s more important that you’re crunching with your abs instead of just hitting your elbow to your knee without using your core. Don’t cheat yourself. Think about the “shoulder to knee” cue instead of elbow. You should feel this in your obliques and your upper abs, and honestly it should be hard.
I didn’t mind this workout, but I probably wouldn’t do it again. Krystal suggests doing 3-5 rounds, and, honestly, I only did two rounds before I got bored. Plus, people were starting to think I didn’t know how to work a treadmill because I was only on it for, like, a minute at a time. On the plus side, I definitely broke a sweat, and felt like it was a pretty sufficient full body routine. I wasn’t sore the next day, but it was a solid workout and I’d recommend you trying it out for yourself. And if you actually do five rounds, you deserve a glass of wine. [Insert 12 fire emojis and a ton of unnecessary checkmarks and some glitter.]
Images: Krystal Nielson, Instagram; Giphy (4).