Congratulations to this week's betchy athlete of the week, Los Angeles Lakers guard Kobe Bryant. Because betches respect nothing if not excellency.
Sunday night, Kobe Bryant surpassed basketball legend Michael Jordan to become the third best scorer of all-time in the NBA. ALL. TIME. He passed Jordan's 32,292 points, and still has time to score more. He even got a Tweet of congratulations from the league's current “King,” Lebron James:
Kobe Bryant has been playing basketball since 1996–almost as long as some of us have been alive. In that time, he has been a 16-time NBA All Star, 15-time member of the All-NBA team, 5-time NBA Champion, 2-time NBA Finals MVP, and was voted the league's Most Valuable Player once.
Basically, Kobe Bryant is unreal. And he set the record Sunday night just a little more than a year after he tore his Achilles tendon, an injury that could have forced him to retire. But Kobe don't take no shit and returned to the floor this season.
But Kobe, like any true hero worth of betchy discussions, is not perfect. These imperfections only add to his appeal. He controls his teammates like a king among serfs. Last week, he belittled them by saying the Lakers are “soft like Charmin.“
Kobe is unbelievably arrogant. He has said multiple times that he is the best basketball player of all time. In many respects, he may be.
For his unbelievable accomplishments, arrogance, and Regina George-esque qualities, Betches Love This salutes Kobe Bryant.