We all know the feeling. You roll into the office 20 (probably 40—be honest with yourself) minutes late on a Friday morning. Your hair smells like shit because some fugly girl spilled her drink on you last night. Is your shirt on backwards?
You’re 24 years old, but still have the habits of a sophomore in college. You normally would be proud of yourself for being able to keep up with a 19-year-old, but stupid fucking Marcia who sits three cubicles over from you won’t STFU.
Marcia is the type of coworker that thinks engaging in pleasant small talk at the crushing hour of 8:30am is acceptable. She was probably also the girl who went out once during orientation and decided binge drinking “wasn’t for her.”
Here’s how to not look like a total piece of shit and pretend to care when the Marcias of the real world attempt to be your friend.