Rob Gronkowski’s Party Cruise Was Just As Fucked Up As We Expected

Rob Gronkowski, the stud tight end for the New England Patriots, may quite literally be our spirit animal. He hosted a “Gronk Party Ship” cruise over the weekend, and got all of the attendees really fucked up. Because what else would he do during the NFL offseason?

Some of the trip highlights: offering a couple $10,000 to have sex in the middle of the cruise. 


And there was a lot of general celebration about being American, and being Gronk.



A few hours in and the Gronkers are at peak Gronk — even in the elevators. #MardiGronk

A photo posted by Sarah Spain (@spain2323) on


Plus some shirtless Gronk as he was a back-up dancer for Flo Rida. Not a fucking joke.



But honestly, these moves. Magic Rob XXL.



Latergram: Gronk is very serious about his offseason dance training program. #MardiGronk

A video posted by Sarah Spain (@spain2323) on

And we can’t forget the magical moment where one couple actually used the giant orgy as an excuse to get engaged:


A giant shitshow. It’s so magical. I love you, Rob Gronkowski.


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