Spotted: S sending Snapchat selfies from the steps of the Met, Nate speaking on behalf of the Archibalds at a Donald Trump rally, Chuck and Blair bickering over their son’s preschool applications, and Dan drinking bourbon and chain-smoking at some hipster festival in Texas. It’s been four miserable years since Gossip Girl officially ended, but the fashion will live on forever. Here’s what our favorite characters would probably be wearing in 2016.
Serena van der Woodsen: the OG BSCB who still had an amazing eye for fashion even after snorting all those pills in boarding school. IRL this betch got knocked up by Ryan Reynolds and tried to start some stupid boho-bougie sweater site, but we like to think that Serena’s still running amuck around the Upper East Side as Karl Lagerfeld’s muse or something, most likely cheating on Dan with an investment banker and looking fabulous while doing it.
Serena’s style says “Im rich AF but also so low-key, did I get this top at Barney’s or the thrift store? You’ll never know.” She balances feminine elegance with masculine elements to appear perfectly effortless. We see her rocking Haute Hippie’s Halter Caravan draped top with some leather pants, Alexander Wang Lovisa pumps, Elizabeth and James Cynnie croc-effect leather bucket bag, and Linda Farrow round mirrored sunglasses.
This betch is married to Chuck now and they popped out who we imagine is the most impeccably dressed demon-child on Park Ave., Henry. (Leighton Meester is actually married to Adam Brody which is totes hilar because Blair would be so out of Seth Cohen’s league amirite??) Headbands aren’t really in any more but this betch is still on fleek.
Blair is all about looking classic, polished, and made of money at all times. No exception. This betch would go crazy over this Victoria Beckham open back dress, Charlotte Olympia suede Dolly pumps, Rebecca Minkoff Becky jacket, and Gucci Soho Disco shoulder bag.
Nate ended up running for Mayor, probably while continuing to cycle through every socialite and MILF in Manhattan until there’s literally no one left to be his hot political sidepiece so he has to import a Victoria’s Secret model from Brazil. Until, that is, she leaves him after his own publication, The Spectator, exposes him for getting caught up in a prostitution ring Spitzer-style. He’s into that classic WASPY “I go sailing, am impotent, and have a golden retriever” kinda look, so he’d love this Peter Millar cotton-cashmere drop needle henley and Vineyard Vines club pants.
“But then I realized I’m a seventeen-year-old billionaire. With tremendous stamina.” And a tremendous wardrobe. Our favorite playboy-turned-family man stole our hearts with those three little words and his dapper suit/bowtie combos. Due to his expensive, outlandish, and slightly flamboyant style, we envision Chuck in this Thom Browne pannelled wool blazer paired with a silk Lanvin bowtie.
“If I wasn’t born into this world, maybe I could write myself into it” was the final GG blast that knocked Upper East Siders off their stationary bicycles. And so he did, both figuratively as Serena’s fiancé five years after the season six finale, and literally as the unmasked Gossip Girl whose identity we spent the greater portion of our adolescent lives obsessing over. Dan goes for the semi-hipster, semi-intellectual look that we imagine you could find on any basic bro in Williamsburg. He’d be into this BLK DNM Suede Jeans Jacket 5 and these A.P.C. jeans with a pair of Converse, obv.
This nicegirl doesn’t even deserve to be on the list lol she sucks just no.
Towards the brink of Jenny’s “indefinite hiatus” from Gossip Girl (only to return to the last episode looking rough as ever), Taylor Momsen and her character Jenny Humphrey started to morph into the same person. By this we mean they both flagrantly abused black eyeliner and fishnet apparel while lurking under the cover of night like a battered raccoon. We don’t have to imagine what Little J might be wearing these days because we can see the terrifying result on stage at an earsplitting Pretty Reckless “concert,” a term we use loosely because it’s more like an audition for a mental hospital.
Who am I now? That’s one secret I’ll never tell.