Frank Ocean Is The Latest Man To Continually Lie To Us

I’m fucking done. How many times am I going to listen to “Novacane” before I fucking go numb with anger? For those of you who don’t pay attention good music, Frank Ocean was supposed to release the highly anticipated album Boys Don’t Cry about four fucking years ago. He has delayed the album release more than I’ve delayed going to the gym. It was rumored that he was finally going to release Boys Don’t Cry this past Friday, and… fucking nothing. Frank(ly), he’s just proven yet again that men are fucking unreliable liars. Boys Don’t Cry, more like I’m Gonna Make This Boy Cry. Also more like America Is Going To Continue To Cry Until You Drop This Fucking Album Already.

Angie Tribeca Crying

Honestly, I don’t even know if he’s still alive. I’m pretty sure the last time anyone really saw him was in 20-fucking-12 when he performed on SNL and John Mayer was randomly playing guitar in the background. Someone needs to Spotlight this shit and find out where the fuck Frank Ocean is hiding. My guess is in some remote cave with Dr. Dre’s Detox and Tupac’s body.

Tupac Hologram

The next rumored release date of the album is in November. Do some Da Vinci Code-style rearranging of letters in “November” and like, take a way a few letters and it spells “Never,” so don’t fucking count on it, betches.

I’m not mad, Frank, I’m just disappointed.

Frank Ocean Waiting


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