Gossip Girl fans are still reeling from accusations posted on Facebook by actress Kristina Cohen alleging that Ed Westwick, aka Chuck “Everyones Early 2000s Fantasy Man” Bass, raped her while she was napping in his guest bedroom. Kristina’s post has gone viral because like, duh, and now Ed Westwick is responding to the rape allegations in the most fuckboy way ever: with a note posted to Instagram.
Uhh…okay dude. Shouldn’t you have like, a lawyer and a publicist and a priest working round the clock on this issue for you? Apologetic Insta notes are for when you accidentally have a nip slip on the red carpet or want to clarify your current beef with Kanye West, not rape allegations. Also, is he really Mariah Carey-ing his rape accuser? I mean, innocent until proven guilty and all but again, seems like a bad strategy.
Now, like most rape allegations, this entire thing will come down to a he-said-she-said with little ability for either side to prove that they are legit. On the one hand, maybe Ed Westwick really doesn’t know her and this girl is just crazy or looking for fame. On the other hand, name a single person who has become a famous actress because they accused someone of rape. I’ll wait.
So like…what’s next? Which beloved male entertainment figure that we thought we could trust are we going to lose to assault allegations next? Timon? Pumba? TRADER JOE?!?! Please God, no. If I lose those deals, IDK what I’ll do.