Diet Coke Got The Makeover Nobody Asked For

In the grand tradition of betchy sleepovers, Diet Coke got a makeover. But much like Tai in Clueless, it didn’t really work out. If anyone knows a marketing intern at Coca-Cola, please alert them to this mess.

The new marketing campaign redesigned the cans to make them all look the fucking same. Like blonde freshmen rushing a southern sorority the same. Every type of Coke—diet, zero, and life—will have the same red circle, and the only difference between the cans will be the accent color on the borders. This is like when you and your friends tried to accessorize your middle school uniforms with Juicy charm bracelets and hair scarves. Spoiler alert: it didn’t make you look that different, and everybody else in the class hated you for it.

Apparently the company wants to cut costs, but there has to be a better way to do that than by confusing people into buying the wrong type of Coke. Also, how costly can different colored packaging really be? I call bullshit, Coke. Obvi, no self-respecting betch would ever switch to Pepsi—that’s just like, the rules of feminism—but still this is some bullshit.


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