Cold Weather Is Actually Helping You Get Skinnier

Because betches are always naturally cold, we’ve always felt like we’ve been at a major disadvantage during the winter time. I mean, while we’re shivering our asses off and chugging all the hot beverages, all of these lucky fat people and women going through menopause have it easy. It’s so tough having these genes.

None of my business

Luckily for us, it turns out there’s a silver lining to all our multi-layered cashmere pain. Fox News just wrote about a new study that proves cold weather actually helps you burn more calories. Fuck that 10-pack of SoulCycle classes you just got for Hannukah. We’re literally burning calories by being in this unbearable cold.


The study talks about something called brown fat and the hormone irisin, which are both involved in energy expenditure. That means when your body shivers, it’s going through an involuntary muscle contraction and burning calories.

TBH the study also makes sure to mention that these calories are pretty minimal in comparison to a real workout, but like, they probably have to say that for legal reasons or something. Either way, let’s hang outside later. Bring wine. 


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