Jalapeño-Pineapple Margs, Olé!

TODAY IS THE DAY: Happy Cinco de Drinko Mayo! To cap off our celebrations (lol who are we kidding—we’re just STARTING them and continuing through the weekend) we have an awesome totally-not-Mexican margarita for you.

When you mix heat and sweet, you find happiness. When you mix pineapple, jalapeño, and a lot of tequila, you see God. Let’s kick off Cinco de Mayo correctly with a big, giant, margarita rimmed with salt and served with nachos.


  • ½ cup water
  • ½ cup sugar
  • 1 jalapeño, sliced down the middle (remove seeds and ribs if you’re a pussy)
  • 2 cups fresh pineapple
  • 3 cups grilled pineapple (literally, buy a bunch of rings and grill on a grill pan until they get stellar marks on them … or just make your bf do it)
  • 2/3 cup white tequila (tequila blanco, for you Spanish-inclined)
  • Lime, cut into wedges
  • Kosher salt
  • Zest from one lime

In a medium saucepan, combine the water, sugar, and jalapeño and cook over medium heat until the sugar dissolves—like 5 mins. Remove from the heat and set aside for like 15 mins, then remove and discard the jalapeño and wait till the whole thing cools.

Grab a giant blender and pour in the cooled syrup plus the grilled pineapple, plain pineapple, and tequila. Blend until super smooth, then transfer to a pitcher and put in the fridge for like, awhile. While you wait, run a lime wedge or two around the rims of a few glasses, then dip in a plate with kosher salt and lime zest. Fill each glass with ice and pour in your delicious, spicy, and amazing margarita. OLE BITCHES! Here’s to your questionable choices this Cinco de Mayo.



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