Chris Soules aka Chris The Farmer is ABC's new Bachelor, SHOCKING. This means a couple of things. Arie Luyendyk Jr. is outie and tweeted some bullshit like “have fun on the farm, people.” Oooohhh burn, Arie. Also, betches across the country might actually learn how a farm works or can like, sort of say they know of someone from Iowa. So glad Chris' lonely nights won't be filled with sheep and snuggling with his mom. I'm fucking pumped.