In case this year’s presidential election and the Brexit wasn’t enough proof that everyone has lost their damn minds, earlier this week some Canadian lady called 911 because her pizza didn’t have the right amount of cheese on it. I can’t even make this shit up.
Don’t get me wrong, I fucking love cheese. Like, when I’m behind someone at Chipotle and they say “just a little bit of cheese,” I immediately judge the hell out of them. So I, too, would be pissed if I waited the world’s longest 45 minutes for my Papa John’s and they screwed me on the cheese.
BUT I wouldn’t call the police because I have common fucking sense, aka I understand that while noncheezy pizza is a huge deal to me, other people out there have real fucking problems and actually NEED help. I also keep my fridge stocked with Italian four cheese blend at all times so I can fix shit like this myself. Take notes, Canada.
So the responding officer came out pretty much saying “IDK what the fuck she wanted me to do about it,” which is exactly what I’m thinking so retweet, sir. I just wish they’d release where she ordered this lackluster pizza from. Pizza Hut? Domino’s? Somewhere we don’t have in the States? Hopefully the latter, but who knows? I mean, if pizza lady is gonna be dramatic AF, the least she can do is write an annoying Facebook rant so the rest of us don’t make the same mistake. Thanks for nothing.