Alright so you're ready to start living a life where it's socially acceptable to get blacked out Mon-Sun. Mazel. I would give my perfectly toned right arm to go back to college. Not that my life isn't awesome now, but there's nothing better than spending your parent's money and having zero regard for other people's feelings, including your own. Since I've already been there – and basically killed it, duh – I've decided to share some of my infinite wisdom with you. You're young, you're in love, you're drunk 98% of the time, you don't know everything. For instance, you know that you need the basics to survive in college – a reliable lawyer, a good curling iron, inspirational quotes to hang on your wall, a literal shit ton of mascara – but what about all that extra stuff? Let me show you the light. Don't forget the following shit, k?
You think all those morning/mid-morning/late-morning/afternoon/mid-afternoon/late-afternoon coffees that curb your appetite and make people mistake you for an Olsen sister aren't going to wreak havoc on your teeth? You're naive AF, but it's okay I guess because you're learning things. Please do us all a favor and be very diligent about your use of teeth whitening strips. Maybe even go crazy and get one of these on the go whitening pen things.
Obviously don't let anyone but a profesh touch your brows. But in between visits, if something pops up, you need to take care of your shit, girl.
'Bout to let you in on the best hangover cure in recent Western/Eastern medicinal history: 1. Rom-com DVD (preferably without Matthew McConaughey because you didn't need another reason to throw up) 2. Weed 3. A series of purifying, then hydrating face masks.
Betches don't break out so much as their skin starts to hate them for no apparent reason at the random-est and worst times. You need a Benzoyl Peroxide or Salicylic Acid spot treatment for these terribly unfortunate moments that even the betchiest of betches can't escape.
I know it sounds hella hippie, but trust me on this one. Similar to the way your adderall will fix everything, coconut oil cures all. Need extra sheen on your legs? Coconut oil. Need to smell like a Tahitian princess? Coconut oil. Need your hair to be the shiniest one in your pledge group? Yes, dumbass, coconut oil.
Don't be dirty, wash your fucking makeup brushes. That's all.
I'm assuming you're young and don't yet believe in the power of eye cream, but it's never too early to start thinking about wrinkle prevention (why I started getting Botox at 13, even though it was determined borderline illegal). Get yourself some eye cream and put it on every night.