Baseball is boring as fuck. Especially when your sorority insists you go to a shitty Diamondbacks game as a “sisterhood event.”
So when these poor betches got stranded in a baseball park with nothing to do but drink beer (fattening, ugh), watch hot bros swing bats in tight pants (no thanks), or selfie? It’s obvious what they had to do.
And then these two arrogant, shaming baseball announcers had the audacity to ridicule the selfie behavior.
“Look at the one on the right.” They’re not fucking animals at a petting zoo.
“Do you have to make faces when you selfie?” Obviously.
“Welcome to parenting in 2015.” There’s a reason they’re on birth control.
“Hold on, time for a selfie with a hot dog. Selfie with a churro.” Yes, they are shaped like penises. They are doing this on purpose.
“The beauty of baseball is you can sit next to your neighbor and have a conversation. Or you can just completely ignore them.” Finally. You get it.
Listen, betches. We’ve got your back. Want us to be interested in your silly game of baseball, MLB? Maybe play in your underwear.