Adding Alcohol To Your Smoothie: Because.

In the constant effort to make ourselves look and feel better, many betches subscribe to the belief that a smoothie or fresh pressed juice from only the rarest and best fruit is their most solid chance to stay skinny and pretty forever. However, on occasion,  we find the need to change things up – perhaps adapting our beloved smoothies from healthy starts to our day to “I’m hungover and only more alcohol will make me feel better” drinks.

Lucky for you, we’re tackling the RIGHT way to add alcohol to your fav smoothie without making it taste like shit. Here are three super easy and super they-were-healthy options for adding booze to your fruit boost.

Mango Smoothie:

1 orange, peeled and halved
½ ripe banana, peeled
½ mango, peeled and pitted
½ medium apple, seeded and halved
1 cup ice
2 shots white rum
Place all of the ingredients except the booze into a blender and blend until smooth. Add the rum. YAYY.

Beet, Strawberry, and Vodka:

¾ cup cranberry juice
¼ cup frozen cranberries
1 small beet, steamed and skin removed
1/3 cup frozen strawberries
2 tsps honey or agave
1/3 cup ice cubes
2 shots cranberry or raspberry vodka
Throw everything in your blender except the vodka, blend until smooth. Add the vodka, stir, and DRANK.

Skip the fruit – coffee and booze:

1 fl. oz. dark rum
1 fl. oz. Amaretto
2 tbsp whipping cream
1 shot of espresso or super strong coffee
Place the rum, Amaretto, cream, and coffee in a blender and blend until super smooth. Strain into a cocktail glass and start your day in style.

Note – we assume you have a limo/taxi/slave to take you anywhere you need to go after you drink this shit. Namaste, betch.


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